I’ve experienced some setbacks lately. I wasn’t in the mood to focus on the things I was supposed to do; instead, I ended up binge-watching videos. It started with a tiny thought: ‘I’m just watching this while I have lunch’—and you know how that ends. I also had an argument with a friend. At the time, I felt he was getting on my nerves on purpose, but now that I’ve cooled down, I think it may have just been a chance to vent the frustration I felt toward myself for not meeting my own expectations.
Some good things have happened, though: I’ve maintained my sleep routine consistently and I’ve been reading every night—even if it was only one page sometimes. I also haven’t even thought about increasing my screen time.
I’ve always been frustrated and angry with myself whenever I experience setbacks, and this time was no exception. This wasn’t ideal, but I guess it’s just part of the journey. I’m not able to regulate my emotions perfectly—no one is, I suppose—but I’m trying to be less angry, in both intensity and duration.
I’m also viewing this as an experiment. Scientists need to conduct numerous tests to get the results they want, and I’m doing the same. Since I’m aware of potential distractions, I’m trying different strategies to respond to them. For example, the downtime on my electronic devices used to be from 9 p.m. to 6:30 a.m., but I’ve changed it to 9 p.m. to 10:30 a.m. and enabled exceptions for necessary apps. As a result, I can use productive apps like Podcasts and Google Docs, but I can’t access social media. I will constantly review the results and change my strategy accordingly. Until the day I can resist those temptations of my own volition, I find screen time limits to be a useful tool.
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